GG’s, Newcastle-upon-Tyne

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I did promise a long time ago that I would go to Newcastle and absorb all of their caramel slices and produce a wonderous amount of reviews. And then I never did. Shame on me.

However, hopefully, this one will be the start of that gooey, crumbly and sticky onslaught, but hopefully not all of the slices fit that description.

GG’s was not a planned trip, I had no intention of them being the first and merely happened upon the cafe based at the bottom, next to the entrance, of Cuthbert House, which I got to via a subway under the massive road that comes from the Tyne Bridge, I believe. 

It was half 8 in the morrow, the cafe was empty, and frankly it was too early to be eating a caramel slice, needless to say I consumed the slice this evening.

The slice was square measuring 6.5cm x 6.5cm and was 1.6cm thick.  And cost me a simple £1, which is bearable to, but I have had bigger ones for less. To give you a better understanding of the distribution of thickness, the Chocolate was 2mm, the Caramel 4mm and the Base made up the final 10mm.

I asked the woman behind the counter if she had any slices. She said yes and added “they sell quite fast” or something to that effect. Does that mean they are really good? Or does it mean they don’t make enough, or people are tasteless?

I’m not really sure, if I’m honest.

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GG’s’ slice threw a mixed bag of flavours at my buds, and I couldn’t quite get to grips with what I was tasting. So much so in fact that the strength and ferocity of some part of the flavour stabbed violently into a taste bud and set a small cascade of liquid fall from my left tear gland. It was like I had just bitten into a chilli or something similar. I did eventually conclude that the taste that so rudely shouted upon the arrival of my gnashers fell somewhere in the regions of ginger. And yet the overall taste was only marginally affected.

Yes, the taste. The caramel flavour was vibrant and came from the most creamy caramel I have ever sucked upon. But the hint of ginger amongst a woody chipboard or MDF flavour was not likable. (No I don’t eat wood, but you know how you smell something and you can taste it too…however that works…). Any other flavour was of a plain/vanilla fudge present in all three layers of the slice. This whirlwind of flavours cast an unhappy eye over an unsettling verdict.

The base is shortcake with a digestive texture and taste that we have seen too often and usually I don’t respond greatly to shortcake. Though I really shouldn’t be too harsh, it is good, I just prefer shortbread.

As for the chocolate, well as I have said it’s thin and sugary and breaks up as fine as it tastes. Fine. 

Due to the consistency of the caramel, fingers became sticky on contact, but I wasn’t too bothered by this.

This slice has a tenacious rich flavour, it is too brash, too pronounced, too confused and too much like it was chopped up by an axe from an old oak tree. Nevertheless it deserves a good solid 6.0 out of 10.

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It feels good to blog again. People ask,  “are you still blogging?” to which I reply yes, but really, I haven’t posted in quite a while. I’ll try do one a week, I will.

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